Divide & Conquer - Vayishlach

Divide & Conquer
Parshat Vayishlach

In this week's Torah portion of Vayishlach we read of the encounter between Yaakov and Esav. The Torah describes how Yaakov is very concerned that Esav would want to harm him and his family, as he had "stolen" the blessings many years earlier. Thus, Yaakov prepares for this confrontation in three ways; (1) he tries to soften Esav's heart by showering him with many gifts, (2) he prays to G-d, and (3) he prepares for war by creating an escape plan and dividing his camp into two forces.

The Torah tells us (Bereishis 32:8) ויחץ את העם אשר אתו... לשני מחנות - And he divided the people that were with him... into two camps".

From a strategic perspective this makes sense. Our forefather Jacob was preparing for multiple scenarios and planning ahead. He was trying to protect his family to the best of his abilities. Our sages derive from this that one must not rely on miracles but plan and be prepared to the best of one's abilities. 

Perhaps there is another lesson as well.

Often, when confronted by a challenge we become overwhelmed and shut down. It may be something that we or our loved ones are dealing with; spiritually, emotionally or financially. The magnitude of our problem or challenge is paralyzing and as a result, we can't do anything at all.

This is when we must learn to divide and conquer. We must take a lesson from our Torah portion and realize that when something is so scary and overwhelming, we must break it down into bite-size pieces and then deal with it, one chunk at a time. An analogy can be made to a student that can't do 20 math problems, so a parent might say "do five problems and go play outside". Later on, the parent can have the student revisit the homework and continue working on it.

Too often, in matters of spirituality or personal growth, the task is so overwhelming that we don't even begin the task. The lesson we learn from our forefather Jacob is break it down into smaller pieces. Divide and conquer and before you know it you will have dealt with the issue at hand.

Shabbat Shalom

Lech Lecha - Live Your Best Life

Parshat Lech Lecha
Live Your Best Life

This week can be called a happy Parshah. While the first portion of the Torah (Bereishit) begins on a positive note and the creation of the world, it ends on a negative one, with the perversion and sinful behavior of mankind. The second portion (Noach) begins with the flood that destroyed all of the world, but concludes with the birth of Avram, a special and righteous individual. It is only in this week's portion, the third portion (Lech Lecha), that we begin and conclude on a positive note, with the story of our patriarch and matriarch, Avram and Sara.

Lech Lecha begins with Hashem's command to Avram and Sara (Bereishit 12:1), "Go forth from your land, from your birthplace, and and your father's house, to the land that I will show you". Avram and Sara began the task of teaching monotheism and spreading the word of Hashem to whomever they met. While they began the task, it continues on throughout history.

Our sages teach us that each and every one of us is meant to carry on the task of our ancestors. While the lands that we live in and the people we meet may change, this task of Lech Lecha reverberates throughout history. The goal also remains the same - "to the land that I will show you", we continue to elevate the sparks of goodness until the time will come when Hashem will tell us, "you have arrived at your destination".

Rashi (France 1040-1105) comments on this verse and says that this journey would be for the good and to the benefit of Avram and Sara. Simply understood, this means that while moving away to a foreign land and starting all over may seem arduous and difficult, Hashem promised them that it would all be for their benefit. 

Perhaps there is a deeper lesson here as well. Anything worthwhile or valuable takes investment. If it was easy and a no brainer, everyone would be successful and a trend-setter. Yet, we see that it takes tremendous courage and determination to break the mold and go against the status quo. As our sages tell us in the Talmud Chagiga, "One who learns Torah and reviews it 100 times, cannot be compared to one who reviews it 101 times". For when you challenge yourself to go out of your own limitations you can truly achieve the blessings of Lech Lecha and live your very best life.

Shabbat Shalom.

What's Your Oasis? - Noach

What's Your Oasis?
Parshat Noach

This week's Torah portion discusses one of the most calamitous events in history - the flood of Noah. We read in the second portion of the book of Bereishit how the world became so corrupted with thievery and immorality that G-d decided to destroy the world. Hashem commanded Noach to build an ark for himself, his family and the animals that would be saved. The rest of the world would be destroyed by a gigantic flood. Indeed, it rained for forty days and nights, "and the fountains of the great deep burst forth and the windows of the heavens were opened" (Bereishit 7:11).

The raging waters of the flood are seen in the writings of our sages as a reference to the struggles and challenges in earning a livelihood and life in general. The majority of human beings experience these raging waters at some point in their lives and struggle.

As it began to rain, Hashem commanded him to go into the Ark, "Then Hashem said to Noach, come to the Ark you and your household" (Bereishit 7:1). Noach and his family entered the ark that he built, and they were saved.

Beyond the simple understanding, our rabbis in the writings of the Chassidic Philosophy see in this phrase a deeper meaning. The Baal Shem Tov explains that the word תבה - Teiva (Ark in English) also means letters - תבות (of the Hebrew Aleph Bet). In other words, the antidote to the ranging waters of the flood and the raging waters of challenges in our lives are the letters and words of Torah and Teffilah (prayer).

The Ark was supposed to be a sanctuary or an "oasis" of sorts from the raging waters outside it. The words of Torah and Teffilah are meant to be a spiritual oasis, protecting us from the challenges and difficulties around us. 

This leaves us with a profound and self reflecting question - when things get tough, when we feel overwhelmed, where is our Ark? What is our Oasis? What are our coping mechanisms? Perhaps the message of the Torah portion is that while we cannot control the raging waters or challenges in our lives, we do have the power to create this oasis and strategies to help us weather those challenges. 

Shabbat Shalom

Always Going - Vayelech

Always Going
Parshat Vayelech

Our sages teach that the portions of the book of Deuteronomy (Devarim) actually take place on Moshe's final day. On this last day of Moshe's life, he gently admonishes, chastises and then lifts up his beloved people (Parshiot of Devarim-Ki Tavo), reaffirms the covenant with them (Parshat Nitzavim), formally takes leave of them (Parshat Vayelech), teaches them his Song (Ha'azinu), and then blesses them (V'Zot H'Bracha).

This week's  portion of Vayelech opens with the narrative of Moshe taking leave of the Jewish people. The Torah tells us (Devarim 31:1-2) "Moshe went and spoke these words to all of Israel. I am a hundred and twenty years old today, I can no longer go out and come in, for Hashem has said to me, "You shall not cross this Jordan".

What's fascinating is, that if this in fact takes place during Moshe's final hours, why was he going somewhere? Hadn't he done enough in his one hundred and twenty years?  Could he not have been resting peacefully, or at the very least, have the Jews come to him?

The Hebrew word, וילך - Vayelech, implies that it was not a happenstance of ending up in a random place, but that he purposefully went with focus and intent. Moshe may have been in his final hours, but he was not done. Until the final breath, he would continue his G-d given mission, to inspire, uplift, and lead.

Often in life, there are times we feel stuck. We hit a wall or obstacle and lack the energy or strength to move forward. Sometimes, it's our circumstance or our age that gets us thinking, "I'm too old for another rodeo", or "I've been down this path before".

Our teacher, Moshe Rabbeinu's life reminds us that until Hashem takes our soul, our mission is not complete. We need to keep on moving. Contrary to the popular notion that at a certain age one "retires" from active life and starts doing nothing, the Torah teaches us that we must be active and engaged until we no longer have the ability to do so. Of course, our jobs or hours may change a bit, but our vitality, engagement, and dedication does not.

Moshe's life was a life of extraordinary measure, because he just wouldn't stop going.

Shabbat Shalom

Choices, Choices - Nitzavim

Choices, Choices 
Parshat Nitzavim

This week's Torah portion of Nitzavim begins with the renewal of the covenant between the Jewish people and G-d. Moses enjoins the Jewish people to be faithful and to make wise decisions. Moshe Rabbeinu also warns the Jewish people of what will happen if they become complacent and begin to adapt the idol worshipping practices of the nations around them.

In the seventh reading we read the iconic commandment to choose life - ובחרת בחיים. "I have placed life and death before you, blessing and curse, and you shall choose life, so that you will live, you and your offspring" (Devarim 30:19).

According to Rashi (France 1040-1105 France) this commandment is meant to be fatherly advice, like a father or mother would encourage his/her child to make good choices and to choose wisely. Rabbi Moshe Feinstein explains that the choices we make affect not only ourselves but our children and the generations afterwards. As such, the conclusion of the verse, "so that you will live, you and your offspring," makes perfect sense.

One may wonder, why does Moshe have to tell us something so obvious "to choose life"? It would seem that most people would choose the path of life and goodness instead of that of death and disaster!

Besides the basic understanding that sometimes the proper and good choice is not as easy or clear as we would like it to be , there is perhaps something deeper here as well. So often, when faced with a big or life-changing decision, the process is a difficult and gut wrenching one. Things are not easy, and our own biases and issues cloud our ability to make the proper choice. We may know in our hearts what is the right thing, but it is extremely difficult to do.

Perhaps, our Torah portion this week is speaking to this conundrum when it tells us "choose life and blessing". We are commanded and given the strength to make the right choices, though it may not be easy. Hashem promises us, Make the proper choices and I will be there with you, helping you and guiding you along the way.

Shabbat Shalom.

Enunciating Your Blessings - Ki Tavo

Enunciating Your Blessings
Parshat Ki Tavo

This week's Torah portion of Ki Tavo begins with the commandment of Bikkurim (the first fruits). This special Mitzvah was performed once the Jews entered the land of Israel and were finally the proud owners of their own land. As the Torah states "It will be when you enter the Land that Hashem your G-d, gives you as an inheritance, and you possess it and dwell in it. And you shall take of the first of every fruit of the ground... put it in a basket, and go to the place that Hashem your G-d will choose to make his name rest" (Devarim 26:1-2).

The Mishnah and Talmud in Tractate Bikkurim discuss in great detail this special commandment and the unique nature of this Mitzvah, as well as the beautiful procession that accompanied it. Along with the procession and presentation was the verbal declaration made by the one bringing the Bikkurim. It was a statement of gratitude, tracing our ancient history from Aramean times to the servitude in Egypt, from G-d's deliverance from Egyptian slavery to becoming land owners in a free and Jewish land of Israel. It concluded with the following words "You shall rejoice with all the goodness that Hashem your G-d has given you and your household..." (Devarim 26:11).

We are certainly all familiar with the Yiddish expression "to Kvetch", which means to complain. Often, we Kvetch about our problems, sorrows, difficulties, and other parts of our lives that we wish would be going better. Understandably, when we go through a rough time, we need blessing, an empathetic ear, a supporting arm. But in the process of "Kvetching", we can lose sight of everything that is going well and the bounty of blessings in our lives.

The declaration of the Bikkurim focused on the attribute of gratitude and being thankful. It is so incredibly vital for us to take the time to look at our lives, our children and grandchildren, the many blessings present, and pause and say, thank you Hashem for all you have given me. An attitude of thankfulness and gratitude helps us weather the difficult times and events in our lives, too. For when we realize the many blessings, we become less focused and less consumed by our Tzurois (difficulties) and realize that in the grand scope of things we indeed have many blessings.

Perhaps, this is a lesson we can incorporate into our lives. Let us enunciate and verbalize the blessings of our lives. Let us take some time every day, to thank G-d for all the wonderful things that are going well. I believe we will live a happier and more fulfilling life as a result.

Shabbat Shalom 

Moving Forward - Ki Teitzei

Moving Forward
Parshat Ki Teitzei

In this week's Torah portion of Ki Teitzei, we read of many different Mitzvot and commandments. Towards the end of the portion we read the famous words "Remember what Amalek did to you on your journey, after you left Egypt - זָכ֕וֹר אֵ֛ת אֲשֶׁר־עָשָׂ֥ה לְךָ֖ עֲמָלֵ֑ק בַּדֶּ֖רֶךְ בְּצֵאתְכֶ֥ם מִמִּצְרָֽיִם- " (Devarim 25:17).

This statement is part of the six historical remembrances, which many recite every day after the morning prayers. There are a number of significant historical events that the Torah tells us to remember every day. Some traditions list only four remembrances and others count as many as ten, but the prevalent custom is to recite six remembrances after the morning prayers. (The first to formulate the text of the six remembrances, as found in many different prayerbooks, was Rabbi Schneur Zalman of Liadi in his Siddur, based on the Midrash and works of the Arizal. www.chabad.org).

I have often wondered why is remembering what Amalek did to us so important that it makes it into the "six remembrances"? Yes, they did something terrible to us. But as our tradition dictates, they tried to kill us, we survived, now let's eat! Why the obsession with looking back at the difficult and challenging episodes? Let's just move forward!

Related to the episode of Amalek attacking the Jewish people shortly after leaving Egypt, the Torah states "Amalek came and battled Israel in Rephidim" (Shemot 17:8). The commentaries address the need for the Torah to tell us exactly where this happened, "in Rephidim".

Rashi (France 1040-1105) explains that this was the place where they questioned G-d, essentially becoming weak in their faith. The Mechilta (a Midrashic commentary from Mishnaic times) explains that the word Rephidim implies "a loosening of their grip on the Torah". In other words, due to their lack of faith in Hashem and loosening their connection to G-d's word, the Jews were attacked by Amalek.

This only amplifies the question of why focus on the negative experience? Can't we just move on?

Being in middle of the month of Elul and preparing for the High Holidays, it is most appropriate to look back at the past year. As we revisit the many experiences of the year, both positive and negative, we often need to face some ugly moments. We remember those moments or events that were most unpleasant and are glad that we are past them. In truth, however, these difficult moments and events have shaped us to who we are at the present day. For better or worse, we are who we are because of our experiences.

Perhaps this is the message and reason of why we read this remembrance. Don't run away from your difficult moments. Don't make believe you didn't fail. Instead lean into them, feel them, own them, because they made you who you are.

If we want to move on and embrace the new year in a healthy way, we can't run away from our experiences. We need to learn from them and transform them into stepping stones for growth.

Shabbat Shalom.

Are you Guilty of Taking Bribes? - Shoftim

Are you Guilty of Taking Bribes?
Parshat Shoftim

This week we read the Torah portion of Shoftim. The portion opens with a number of commandments related to establishing and maintaining the integrity of the courts. One of these laws is the prohibition against taking or accepting a bribe.

The Torah states (16:19) ולא תקח שחד כי השחד יעור עיני חכמים ויסלף דברי צדיקים - You shall not accept a bribe, for the bribe will blind the eyes of the wise and make just words crooked”.

On the surface,  this commandment seems to be a no-brainer. We should not pervert justice or let the law be swayed by a bribe. Judges should be impartial, non biased, and be completely beyond reproach. Our belief in the justice system is based on trust that the judicial system is ethical, moral and free of corruption. In addition, even if judges have no intention of perverting justice, they are still forbidden from taking any money or bribe, even to do the right thing, for money and bribes turn us into different people.

For the sake of clarity, what exactly is a bribe? A bribe is when we take money or even advice in order to deliver a certain outcome or guarantee. The bribe sways us from whatever thoughts or decisions we may come to on our own, pushing us in the direction of the one who offered the bribe.

As we make our way through the month of Elul, the preparatory month before the High Holidays, we should consider if we have taken a bribe? Maybe we have not taken a monetary bribe to pervert justice, but maybe we accepted a mental or emotional bribe? Have we perhaps “bribed” and convinced ourselves of what we can or cannot do? Has our Yetzer Ha'ra (evil inclination) convinced us that we cannot achieve great things or step up?

Perhaps the message of our parshah is to not allow ourselves to be swayed from our true selves! Do not accept a bribe against yourself! You are so much more than what you allow yourself or others to convince you. G-d put you on earth to achieve great things. You must believe in yourself, and for heaven's sake, don't take a bribe.

Shabbat Shalom.

Platinum Status - Re'eh

Platinum Status
Parshat Re'eh

Every traveler knows the routine for boarding a plane. First come the Platinum Members (or their equivalent) and then the rest. These "special travelers" get to board the plane first, sit in first class, have special other perks and more. Like it or not, they represent the wealthy, elite and privileged.

This week we read the Torah portion of Re'eh. Among the many laws and commandments in this portion are the laws of Kashrut (dietary laws) and laws of how we are to treat our own person (body). The fourth Aliya (section) of our Parshah begins with the words "בנים אתם לה' אלקיכם - You are children to Hashem your G-d" (Devarim 14:1).

The simple understanding of this verse is that all these laws mentioned in our portion are seen as a lift-me-up, positive experience, as opposed to things that we are not allowed to do, essentially a negative experience. The idea is that our relationship with these commandments should come from a place of love and a sense of being part of royalty. G-d asks of us, as His children, to behave in a certain manner, reflecting His holiness and royalty. If you are going to fly first class, then look and behave the part.

Similarly, when one believes in the infinite soul and its ability to rise far beyond the physical realm, they can appreciate that death and loss is not the sum total of the person's life, as they really do live on for eternity. This then leads to measured grief and sadness at the difficult and challenging moments in our lives (Ramban/Seforno). If you are going to be part of the elite, then your appearance and mannerism should reflect sophistication. 

Parenting is not an easy job. It does not come with an operations manual or a perfect strategy. Often, we struggle to relate to our child's unique personality and set of realities. Very often, we have an image or expectation of what should or should not be done, often predicated on our own childhood and experiences. As is certainly bound to happen, our children will test our patience and boundaries. They will want to do things their own way and try those things we know are harmful to their well being.

What do we do? How do we inspire them to be the best they can be? 

This week's Torah portion offers some beautiful and practical advice on the subject. Moshe does not reprimand us into keeping kosher or hollers at us for wanting to try abominable things. Rather, he lifts us up with the statement "You are children To Hashem your G-d, - For you are a holy people to Hashem, your G-d, and Hashem has chosen you for Himself to be a treasured people" (Devarim 14:1-2). Moshe seeks to inspire and uplift, recognizing that self-worth and a healthy religious experience is infinitely more powerful than a negative and condescending one. 

What an empowering and uplifting lesson! Inspire and lift up. Praise and compliment. Of course, there is a time and place for rebuke and measured words, but by in large, our message should be one of love and praise, which leads to healthy spiritual growth and longevity. 

Shabbat Shalom,

Hearing and Listening - Eikev

Hearing and Listening
Parshat Eikev

This week we read the Torah portion of Eikev. This portion is chock-full of many Mitzvot as well as the V'haya Im Shamoa (the second chapter of the Shema Yisrael). Of course, the Shema Yisrael contains three different chapters, which are found in the Torah portions of V'Etchanan (Ch. 1), Eikev (Ch. 2), and Shelach (Ch. 3) respectively. 

This second chapter of the Shema in our Parshah begins with the words (Devarim 11:13)
" והיה אם-שמוע תשמעו אל מצותי - It will be that if you hearken to My commandments".

The next verses of the chapter go into great detail of all the blessings and gifts Hashem will provide to us, if we listen to His commandments.

Our sages expound the double form of the verb שמוע תשמעו (lit. if hearken you will hearken) to imply a double measure of understanding and blessing. Rashi commentary (France 1040-1105 France) explains "that if you will hearken to what you have already learned, by taking care to review and and understand it, then you will gain fresh insights in the Torah." Similarly, if one neglects their study, the loss and forgetfulness will become magnified. The Or Ha'Chaim Hakadosh (Italy 1696-1743) takes this a step further and explains this to mean "if you use your heart to listen and use the wisdom you already have, then Hashem will grant you further wisdom".

In the Yiddish language there are two words that are very similar. The word הערען (Heren) means to hear or listen. The word דעהערען (Derheren) means to truly comprehend or become one with the idea or thing.

 When we feel that we are not truly being heard or understood, we become frustrated. How often do we ask our children, spouses or students "are you listening?", because even if they heard us, the question on our minds is, "are they really hearing what we are saying".

Perhaps this is the lesson we can derive from the double verb in our portion. That Hashem wants us not only to hear Him and His commandments, but to really listen, comprehend and buy in to what is being said. When we truly listen and hear, then we are deserving of the greatest blessings.

Shabbat Shalom,

Is anyone Listening? Va'etchanan

Is anyone Listening?
Parshat Va'etchanan


This week's Torah portion of Va'etchanan continues the narrative of Moses. He describes how he prayed and pleaded with G-d Almighty to forgive him and allow him to enter the land of Israel. Alas, Hashem decided that it was not meant to be and Moshe Rabbeinu would pass away before entering the holy land. Moshe's sin of hitting the rock instead of speaking to the rock (Parshat Chukat) had lasting and severe consequences.

Our sages tell us (Midrash Devarim Rabba) that Moshe beseeches and G-d 515 different times to allow him to enter Eretz Yisrael.  We derive this from the fact that the verse (Deuteronomy 3:23) states: "I pleaded (ואתחנן) with HaShem", and ואתחנן has the numerical value (gematria) of 515. It was just not meant to be. G-d had decided no. 

This teaching leaves us with a profound question, what happened to all of Moshe's tears and prayers? Were they a waste of time? For that matter, what happens to us when we pray for something and it is not realized? Are we wasting our time and energy?

The portion of Va'etchanan is read the Shabbat after Tisha B'Av (the day of mourning commemorating the destruction of the two temples in Jerusalem). As the destruction of the Bet Hamikdash is seen as the source for all tragedies and future exiles that we have endured, it begs understanding. We prayed and cried asking for a reprieve and salvation, did we waste our time and energy?

This week's Haftarah begins with the words of the prophet "Nachamu, Nachamu Ami-be consoled, be consoled my people" (Isaiah 40). Hashem is comforting the Jewish people after the terrible destruction. Our sages explain that comfort takes on different meanings and differing feelings. When someone G-d forbid experiences a tragedy or loss, there is not much anyone can do to change that reality. The act of comforting, is one of empathy, kindness, and letting the person know that you are with them in their time of struggle and hardship. That is the first level of Nachamu-being comforted. The second level of Nachamu is when we can grasp the reason or make some sense of a difficult situation. In this week's Haftarah, Hashem promises to bring us both levels of comfort.

When we pray and cry out to Hashem for something, we recognize that we can only ask for what we, in our limited understanding, think is the best. Yet, we must also recognize that G-d's plan is beyond our understanding or ability to comprehend. Our job is to pray and request the best, based on our understanding as human beings. The rest we leave up to G-d. Every prayer and tear, every experience we have, shapes us into who we are. The prayers we offer and the conversations we have with G-d help us become who we need to be. Only G-d knows what journey lies ahead for each and every one of us, and what we are supposed to accomplish on this earth.

So no, the prayers and tears are not wasted. G-d does hear our prayers, but sometimes the things we want are not meant to be. But each experience we have, each prayer we offer, each tear we shed, helps us mature and become the best versions of us.

May we only see revealed good and blessings in our lives.
Shabbat Shalom.

 

Choose Your Words Wisely - Devarim

Choose Your Words Wisely
Parshat Devarim / 9th of Av

This week's Torah portion of Devarim is the first of the book of Deuteronomy. This final book of the five books of Moses, recounts the final episodes of the forty years in the desert. Additionally, it serves as the final words or last will and testament of Moshe to the Jewish people. Moshe recounts the many episodes in the desert, chastises the people for missed opportunities and sinful behavior, imploring his people to be the best they can be. Like a father on his deathbed, he lovingly uses the book of Devarim to share his wisdom and hopes for the Jewish people. This book is different in the sense that it is written in first person, by Moshe Rabbeinu, as he shares his final thoughts and words.

The portion opens with the words " אלה הדברים אשר דבר משה-These are the words that Moses spoke to the Jewish people". It is interesting to note, that the Hebrew word Devarim has multiple meanings; (a) words from the root word "Daber" to speak, (b) things or objects. In English it is called Deuteronomy which comes from the Greek word "to repeat" or "copy", as this final book of the Torah is in many ways a repetition and a recapping of many previously stated events.

The portion of Devarim is always read in close proximity to Tisha B'Av (9th of Hebrew month of Av), the national day of mourning for the destruction of the First Temple by the Babylonians (586 BCE) and the destruction of the Second Temple by the Romans (70 CE). Additionally, many other tragedies befell the Jewish people on this day. The day is marked by fasting and mourning.

The Talmud (Yoma 9b) relates that the Second Temple was destroyed because of Sinat Chinam (baseless hatred. Even though the populace was occupying themselves with Torah, precepts and charity, it was the Sinat Chinam that brought about their destruction and that of the Bet Hamikdash (Temple).

While there is no direct correlation between the portion of Devarim and the events of Tisha B'Av, perhaps there is a lesson to be learned about the Devarim-the words we choose to speak.

Words are a powerful gift and tool. We can build relationships, conduct commerce, and use our words in many positive ways. We can however also use words to destroy those around us, to sow hatred and resentment, and cause unimaginable harm. Words said to us as children may haunt us decades later. For this reason we are told "Guard your tongue from evil, and your lips from speaking deceit" (Psalms 34).

Sometimes we have a responsibility to say something. It may be constructive criticism, a rebuke, or something that will help another person. What we have to say may be very difficult for the listener to hear, even if we have the best intentions and it comes from a pure and positive place. And yet, to hold your tongue and not give the constructive criticism or parental advice, is also not a good option.

Perhaps, as we read of Moshe's rebuke and chastisement we can learn from HOW Moshe chose to deliver his chastisements and rebuke. He does so in veiled references, kind words, and seeks to uplift his people, not tear them down. Even when we must say a strong word, give criticism etc., the WAY we deliver these words is critical. This is then the connection between our portion and the epic failure of our people in the times of the destruction of the Second Temple. Sinat Chinam (baseless hatred) is the product of using words and actions in an ugly and hurtful manner, while our teacher Moshe used his words in a caring and uplifting one. 

The words we use and the way we deliver them have an everlasting impact.
May we merit to see the Bet Hamikdash rebuilt speedily in our days, Amen.

Shared Journeys - Matos-Masei

Shared Journeys
Matos-Masei

This week's Torah portion of Matos-Masei recounts a number of episodes that took place at the very end of the forty year period that the Jews spent in the wilderness. Additionally, our portion recounts the forty-two stops or journeys that the Jews made during this period. As we conclude this double portion, and the entire book of Bamidbar - Numbers, we call out in unison as our tradition dictates  "Chazak, Chazak, V'Nitchazek - May we be strengthened and strengthened and be strong. 

According to Rabbi Yisroel Bal Shem Tov (1698-1720 Poland/Russia), each and every individual soul experiences forty-two journeys in their lifetime, mirroring the journeys of Am Yisrael-the Jewish people. These journeys are often complicated, uncomfortable, and challenging. Yet, it is only through these journeys that we can reach our individual "promised land". Each one of these experiences, makes us stronger, wiser, and more empowered to fulfill our own personal mission. 

Similarly, our ancestors spent forty years in the desert, traveling together, sharing experiences, both good and bad, and making many mistakes along the way. However, in the end, they were a people with a shared history, shared journey and shared experiences. They were now ready for their next chapter - the promised land.

As I do every summer, I just returned from another Taglit-Birthright Israel trip. My wife and I were privileged to be the Jewish Educators, imbuing the trip with spirituality, meaning, and a perspective, different then what our participants encounter daily. Being the age of many of our participant's parents, I guess we served in the parent role as well. Similar to our past trips, it was an inspiring and meaningful experience, along with delicious Israeli food and very hot weather.

One of the secrets of what makes Birthright Israel trips so successful and special, is the shared experience that everyone in the group shares. As each day of the trip passes, there is more connectivity, friendship, and sharing that occurs. The end result is forty strangers feeling like one Mishpacha-family. By design, the shared experiences, emotional, spiritual and physical, help the group bond together.

So too, our ancestors spent forty years traversing the desert together. Their shared experiences were meant to mold them into a cohesive nation and help them achieve their next goal - the ascension to Eretz Yisrael. It wasn't always pretty, but in the end, they were stronger because of these journeys.

As we each go through our own personal forty-two journeys, let us reflect not only on the end-goal, but also on the shared experiences and growth that allows us to achieve our own promised land. Indeed, we become strengthened through our many shared journeys.

Chazak, Chazak, Vnitchazek!


Shabbat Shalom,

In the Mountain - Behar

In the Mountain Parshat Behar

This week's Torah portion begins with the words “ וידבר ה׳ אל משה בהר סיני - And HaShem spoke to Moshe at Mt. Sinai”. For this reason, our portion is called Behar, “at the mountain”, as the laws taught in this portion were given to Moses at Mt. Sinai.

When looking at the word Behar -literally translated as, “in the mountain”, one can wonder why this specific terminology is used, when it could have easily stated “near Mt. Sinai” or “at Mt Sinai”. Of course, in Biblical Hebrew, it is perfectly acceptable to use the stated terminology as well, as it can also mean. “at Mt. Sinai”.

But perhaps there is a deeper lesson to be derived.

Have you ever taken a leisure drive or road trip to a place with magnificent mountains? Have you ever driven through the Rockies or the Grand Tetons? As one approaches the mountains, they seem ominous and fearsome. The sheer height and size of them make us look puny and small. But as you continue driving up through the mountains, you become more enveloped by the terrain and the mountain doesn’t seem as large and mighty. Nothing had really changed at all, but being in the mountain, you just don’t see or appreciate the great expanse and sheer size of it, because you are in it, as opposed to seeing it from a distance.

Most things in life are quite similar. We see life’s challenges and vicissitudes, and are overwhelmed. Our response or plan of action is to put one foot in front of the other and take little steps to move forward. Later on, as we look back,  it’s amazing to see what we have accomplished or situations we have weathered. 

Perhaps the lesson from the words “Behar - in the mountain”, is that when we embark on challenging experiences or are trying to raise our children, the task seems insurmountable. We are facing a great and tall mountain. Yet, as we take small steps, follow the trusted guidance of our Torah and sages, the small steps become giant leaps and we find ourselves deep in the mountain of life. We look back and marvel at how far we have come.

The moral for us all is to not get overwhelmed, but to forge ahead one step at a time. We must live inside the mountain, not look at it from the outside.

Shabbat Shalom, Rabbi Y. Marrus

Holy Parenting-Kedoshim

Holy Parenting
Parshat Kedoshim

This week's Torah portion of Kedoshim opens with the words, " קדשים תהיו - You shall be holy", enjoining us to be a holy nation and people. The following verse speaks about the Mitzva of honoring our parents, as the Torah states "Every man: your mother and father you shall revere" (Vayikra 10:1-3).

According to the commentary Sforno (Italy 1470-1550), the common denominator between these commandments, being holy, honoring parents, and the subsequent Mitzvot of Shabbat, and not worshiping idols, is that we are to be different and elevated from the ancient nations of the world. The Mitzvot provide a framework in how we are to act, to be morally superior.

I have often wondered why the Mitzvot of  being holy and honoring our parents are mentioned in such close proximity to each other?! What is is about these two commandments that binds them? In fact, they seem quite different from each other; (a) yearning for holiness and a connection to G-d, and (b) honoring our parents, notwithstanding their faults and deficiencies.

Perhaps by inverting the text  somewhat, we may read it as follows-by honoring our parents and understanding the fundamental quality of parenting, we can then become more G-dly and more holy. 

What is the meaning of being a parent? Beyond the biological facts and realities, parenting is something that is far more meaningful and life-changing than just a biological reality. Our sages tell us "There are three partners in the formation of a person: G-d, the father and the mother. The parents each contribute to the creation of the body, and G-d puts in the spirit"( Talmud Nidda 31a). When we are cognizant that we are a partner with Hashem and our spouse in forming a new life, it reminds us of the great responsibility we carry. It reminds us that the little person we are caring for does not belong to us, but rather, is a gift from G-d that we may enjoy. By the same token, it also reminds us that our parents were partners with Hashem in our creation.

This is what the Mitzvah of being holy is all about, and its connection to honoring our parents. When we recognize that we are someone else's gift, and we respect them for their role in our existence, even if they are not perfect, we have acted in a holy manner. We must also apply the same lesson to our precious children, recognizing that we are blessed by their presence. Our children are not ours, but they are a gift that we get to enjoy.

This is true holiness -living our lives and raising our children in an environment that celebrates each and every individual person.

Shabbat Shalom,

The Virtue of Busyness - Acharei

The Virtue of Busyness
Parshat Acharei

Summer is in the air. With Pesach behind us and school break just a couple of weeks away, it is normal to start thinking about summer plans for our families. So many of us struggle with the following question, do we pack our children's summer schedule or do we purposefully not overschedule their days?

In this week's Torah portion of Acharei, we read of the special Yom Kippur service of the Kohen Gadol (High priest). Quite different than today's Yom Kippur experience, where we all sit in Shul all day and pray from a Machzor (High Holiday prayerbook), in the days of the Bet Hamikdash it was a solo performance by the Kohen Gadol. The Mishnah and Talmud dedicate an entire tractate to the service of Yom Kippur and all of its details. In this Tractate Yoma, we learn of the extremely hectic schedule of the Kohen Gadol on this day. Beginning early in the morning of Yom Kippur, he began the service with the standard Avoda (temple service), moved on to the special Yom Kippur sacrifices, the five immersions in the Mikva (ritual bath), and the changing of clothes (from the all-white vestments to the golden vestments), and finally the apex of Yom Kippur-the Ketores, the special offering of incense in the Holy of Holies.

In short, it was an exhausting and emotionally draining day for the Kohen Gadol, while the rest of the community waited for him to finish. 

It seems counterproductive to be so busy with technicalities and details on such a holy day. Would it not have been more spiritually fulfilling to sit quietly, deep in thought, and pray? Why was there the need to have the Kohen Gadol so busy, running from service to service, all the while trying to focus spiritually on forgiveness for himself, his family, and the Jewish nation?

Perhaps this is a lesson in time management and success, and it might also be a lesson in true spirituality and growth. So often, we tend to think about growth and success in terms of a quick fix. We want instant gratification and results. Holiness is associated with things that make us feel spiritual and holy. We think that it is about pausing instead of doing.

I would like to suggest that the Torah is sharing with us a great truth- that holiness is about bringing spirituality into every aspect of our lives, instead of trying to escape to a holy place outside of our lives. If you want to be productive and live life to the fullest, try bringing meaning and purpose to your busy and hectic life instead of trying to run away from it. Being holy and spiritual is about doing good things regularly, not just once in a while. If someone cares about their health, they exercise regularly, not overdoing it on one day, but rather exercising consistently and routinely.

We are never too busy for growth and the ability to find meaning in our everyday tasks. As the saying goes, "If you need something done, give it to an extremely busy person". Because, when a person can organize and structure their time and find purpose in every moment, they will not only get things done, but they will be purposeful in everything they do.

Wasting time or doing nothing is counter productive. Yes, we need change from time to time, and we need to be mindful about stress, being overworked and unfocused. But doing nothing or not having focus never brings good things. Instead, we should find mindful ways to change our environments and everyday routine during the summer to bring our children a welcomed change and excitement in their vacation. But let us not forget that being busy and productive is a blessing and something that breeds success.

Shabbat Shalom,
Rabbi Y. Marrus 

The Broken Whole Matzah - Pesach

The Broken Whole Matzah
Passover Second Days

As we prepare to enter the last days of Passover, and the allure of a fresh slice of pizza and real cake start, let us examine more closely this “bread of affliction” that we have been eating since the holiday began some seven days ago. The Matzah, made simply with water and flour and baked within eighteen minutes, has no time to rise. As such, it does not become Chametz-leaven. This simple poor-man’s bread is the Matzah that we are commanded to eat during the duration of the Passover holiday.

But what is it about this bread of affliction, this broken bread, that is so special.

The famous Rabbi Menachem Mendel of Kotzk (1787-1859 Poland) known for his witty and pithy wisdoms shared many deep and meaningful sayings such as "there is nothing more straight than a crooked ladder" or "there is nothing more black than the (white burial) shrouds" and most famously, "there is nothing more whole than a broken heart." I want to humbly suggest another pithy wisdom - though obviously my suggestions don't rise to the level of the famed and venerated Kotzker Rebbe - There is nothing more whole than a broken matzah.

I don't speak of the literal Matzah, since as time has taught us, once it gets cracked, it can't be made whole again. I speak however, of the broken matzah that represents a sense of wholeness and humility at the same time. For when we recognize that we are broken, that is the greatest stepping stone and catapults a true sense of self-worth and identity.

The broken matzah, is the eternal awareness that this Matzah will never again be a perfect circle (square for some) again and will always need someone else to complete it. It is the intimate realization that without HaShem we are nothing and without our fellow we are lacking. But when we allow Hashem into our lives and recognize the G-dly spirit in another, we are not diminished, in fact we are elevated to become truly whole.

Pesach is our special opportunity to step away from the “leaven of life, representing ego and haughtiness, and grants us the ability to access our higher selves. While we eat “whole bread” all year, it is during these special days of Pesach that we access our innermost vulnerable selves. 

Indeed, there is nothing as whole as recognizing that we are lacking.

With blessings for a Chag Sameach, Rabbi Y. Marrus

Eat. Faith. Heal - Passover 5782

Eat. Faith. Heal. Passover 5782

Passover brings forth so many memories and experiences. Almost every family has family-specific customs, memories, and humorous stories of Seders past. That’s part of what makes Passover such a cherished holiday with cherished traditions.

Of all the commandments, customs and rituals of the Passover Seder, one stands out as being the most synonymous with the Passover experience – the eating of the Matzah. As we recite in the Haggadah, “This Matzah that we eat… is because the dough of our ancestors didn’t have time to rise before the Holy One Blessed Be He redeemed them”.

Why the big deal about eating Matzah? Is there possibly something more to it?

The Holy Zohar (main work of Kabbalah) teaches that the Matzah that we eat on Passover night is the Matzah of Emunah (Faith) and the Matzah of Refuah (Healing). The eating of the Matzah represents the faith we had in G-d Almighty that he would redeem us and that he would heal us from all our ailments.

In this spirit we are taught that when we eat the Matzah at our Passover Seders, we focus on Faith and Healing. We ask G-d to help us have faith, to broaden our intellectual and emotional capabilities, to be able to surrender ourselves to His master plan. It’s not exactly an easy task.

Additionally, as we eat our Matzah we pray for healing. We are not only asking for physical healing from sickness and disease, but spiritual healing, and cleansing as well, which allows us to become sensitized to G-dliness and holiness. 

These two ideas are interconnected. As Jews, we recognize that our long and complicated history is intertwined with our ability to connect to the spiritual and see the silver lining in the most difficult of situations.

Matzah is the magic potion that allows us to tap into the deepest part of our souls. 

May Hashem bless all of us with good health, Nachas, wisdom, clarity and the ability to be healed, spiritually and physically, and to reconnect with our faith in a more profound manner than ever before.

From our family to yours, we wish you a  Chag Kosher V’Sameyach - A happy and Kosher Passover.

Rabbi Y. Marrus 

The Four Kups - Pesach

The Four Kups
Chag Ha'Pesach 

The Pesach holiday is all about education. The Seder is steeped with special things that we do in order to engage the children and have them ask many questions. In fact, one of the biblical Mitzvot of Passover is the Mitzvah of education. As the Torah states  והגדת לבנך - and you shall relate it to your children (Shemot 13:8).

Another theme of Passover eve is the number four. Four cups of wine represent the four expressions of freedom, and the four exiles that the Jewish people endured. Finally, the four sons are enumerated in the Haggadah. These four sons; the wise son, the wicked son, the simple son, and the son who does not know how to ask, represent not only four positions in our spiritual realities, but also how we all possess each one of these characteristics. Sometimes we are wise, yet sometimes we are simple, etc. We are all of these different children, albeit not all together at the same time.

Many years ago I attended a lecture on education by a well known educational psychologist. In his lecture he focused on a phenomenon known as The Four Quadrants of the Mind. These four quadrants or mental attitudes are categorized as (1) The Subjective (2) The Objective (3) The Inter-subjective and (4) The Inter-objective. In simpler terms, these four perspectives are what makes us (1) Followers (2) Leaders (3) Producers and (4) Achievers.  The point of this workshop was to emphasize that human beings can be divided into four general categories, and the way we process information and learn is also broken down into four categories as well.

As I listened to this lecture, two thoughts came to my mind. First, I thought about the verse from Proverbs (Mishlei 22:6) when King Solomon tell us "Educate a child according to his path, he will not turn from that path even as he grows old." My second thought was of the Passover Haggadah and the Four Sons that we speak about in the Seder. Modern Science and psychology had figured out what we have known for thousands of years.

The greatest mistake we make as a society is when we lump all people together. We set one expectation or one path for everyone. Both the Torah and Science reject this idea. In fact, every person is different, and we process information, experiences, and spirituality in different ways. As we clearly see people have different interests, styles and modalities of learning.

As we celebrate Pesach and prepare to sit at our Seders with our loved ones, let's not forget to interact with all the different types of learners at our Seder table. With a bit of effort we can engage everyone at our table and celebrate the reality that while a beautiful explanation on the Haggadah may inspire one person, a beautiful Niggun (song), or skit will inspire another.

May we all be blessed with a Chag Kosher V'Sameyach-a happy healthy and kosher Passover.

Rabbi Y. Marrus 

Counterpoints - Metzorah

Counterpoints
Parshat Metzorah


In this week's Torah portion we discuss at great length the purification process of the Metzorah (the leper). The leprosy discussed in last week's portion Tazria, and continued in this weeks portion, was a physical, yet spiritual ailment, which came about due to the sin of gossip (Lashon Hara). After a process of Teshuvah (repentance) and soul searching, the afflicted person was to bring a special offering to the Bet Hamikdash (temple).

Later on in the Parshah, we discuss another category of Tzarat (leprosy), one that would afflict people's homes. What is strange is the juxtaposition of  this type of Tzarat, as it is listed in an entirely different section, separated from all other forms of leprosy. Due to this juxtaposition, our sages derive a fundamental difference in types of leprosy.

The Sifra and Vayikra Rabbah (Midrashim on Leviticus) explain, that this type of leprosy is fundamentally different that the others. The "home leprosy" was not a negative thing, but rather, a positive one. When the Jews entered the land of Canaan, many of the inhabitants hid their wealth in their homes. Hashem therefore sent this Tzarat, and as the beams and plaster of the homes were removed, the treasures were found. Other commentators like the Rambam (Spain 1138-1204) disagree and see it as a negative thing, but different in structure, as it afflicts a persons home, not their body. In the opinion of these commentaries, Tzarat would first visit a person's home as a superficial warning, then their clothing, and only then their own body, if they did not repent.

It is fascinating to observe that our commentators not only see a different lesson in this matter, but actually view the "home leprosy", as counterpoints. 

So often, our experiences in life share this common dichotomy. What we view as a negative event, can in hindsight become the catalyst for growth and positivity. Today, we see things from one perspective, tomorrow from another. What we think was a blessing today, can in fact turn out to be challenging in the future. Take for example, that according to the Certified Financial Planner Board of Standards, nearly a third of lottery winners declare bankruptcy-meaning they were worse off than before becoming rich! The "blessing" of winning the lottery was not necessarily a blessing after all.

Perhaps the lesson to be learned from this is, that it is ok to look at our life's events from both perspectives. It is ok to feel and process something and see it as a negative in its current state, yet leave the door open for a positive outcome in the future. Similarly, we can view what seems as a positive, and be guarded about it, as we don't know what the end result is. As our sages advise us to pray for "open and revealed good" and that "Hashem bless us with what He knows we truly need."

When our children experience something difficult or upsetting, even if we don't see it the way they do, we must validate their feelings and understand what they are feeling at the moment. But we must also plant the seeds for a deeper realization and awareness of this same episode in the future. What is negative today will not necessarily be completely negative tomorrow.

With blessings for a Shabbat Shalom and peace in the world.

Rabbi Y. Marrus

No Pain No Gain-Tazria

No Pain, No Gain

Parshat Tazria

In this week's Parshah of Tazria, the Torah opens with the laws of ritual purity and impurity. The first law taught is regarding a woman that gives birth and then becomes Tameh-ritually impure. After a set number of days, the new mother must bring an offering to the Bet Hamkidash (Temple). Although in today's day and age this no longer applies, there is still the custom held by many families that the first "outing" after childbirth is to the synagogue, where the new mother recites the blessing of Hagomel-a blessing of  thanks and gratitude. The blessing of a baby is one of the greatest blessings possible. A healthy mother and baby is truly nothing short of a miracle. While it happens so often that we may forget the miraculous nature of it, G-d forbid, when something doesn't go well, we are reminded what an incredible miracle it actually is.

Hence, the question remains: why is the new mother ritually impure-Tameh? After bringing a new life into the world and experiencing this G-dlike moment of creating a child, she should be anything but ritually impure!

Some commentaries connect this with the sin of the Tree of Knowledge, and explain that the Tumah is actually associated with the punishment of Chava (Eve) in the book of Berishit (Genesis 3:16). The Kotzker Rebbe (R' Menachem Mendel of Kotzk 1787-1859) explains that anyone who has experienced childbirth knows fully well that this may be the greatest miracle that they will ever witness in their lifetime. The holiness of the miracle is so intense that after it subsides there is some level of mundanity and Tumah left over. This is what this ritual impurity is about.  The Kli Yakar (1550-1619 Poland) brings an explanation from the Holy Zohar (primary work of Kabbalah), that evil spirits always attach themselves to holy things and holy places. As evil is parasitic, it always looks for the Holy to degrade it. After the holiness and presence of Hashem departs (after the birth occurs), evil then tries to fill the void. This is why there is a level of Tumah left.

Perhaps there is also a simpler message that we can learn from this portion. 

We all want success. We want good outcomes and a desire to live a good life with all the pleasures. Yet, success and achievement do not come easily. It takes much hard work and investment to reap the benefits. Nothing is free and nothing is earned without blood, sweat and tears, as the saying goes, No Pain, No Gain. The problem is that we want the success without the hard work. This is quite similar to a cute baby that everyone coos over. While some marvel at the cuteness and fun of the baby, every parent knows the hardship of pregnancy, lack of sleep, financial cost, commitment and investment placed into this beautiful child.

Perhaps a lesson that we can teach our children is that if there is no investment there will not be a return. Hence, while a new mother celebrates her new role, baby and miracle, there is still some spiritual impurity-reminding us that anything worthwhile takes personal investiture and commitment. 

With prayers for peace in the world.

Shabbat Shalom,

Rabbi Y. Marrus 

Glass Ceilings-Shemini

Glass Ceilings
Parshat Shemini-Parah

This week we read the third portion of the Book of Vayikra (Leviticus) called Shemini. This portion discusses the inauguration of the Tabernacle in the wilderness, also known as the Mishkan, and focuses on the 8th day of the celebration. This 8th day was uniquely special because it was the day that Aaron became the High Priest, and dedication of the holy Tabernacle was complete.

According to Jewish mysticism and Kabbalah, the number 8 represents something extraordinary. While the number 7 represents the natural order of the world and the seven days of creation, the number 8 represents that which is above nature. The number 8 is about taking life and everything we do to an entirely different level. As the Yiddish saying goes, "A Tefach Hecher", to live life on an entirely higher sphere.

In ancient times, all study was done by heart. The study of the Torah and its commentary were reviewed 100 times by every student, in order to retain the teaching. That was the expected and followed practice. Our sages in the Talmud greatly praise the one who reviews his study 101 times. Because that one extra time is taking your study to an entirely new level. While it is technically only one more time, in essence, you are shattering the glass ceiling and challenging yourself to be “A Tefach Hecher” - on a higher level.

One of the greatest gifts we can give our children is a strong and healthy self confidence. Not a silly reality or a denial of our deficiencies, but a realization that notwithstanding them, they can still do amazing things. We must instill in our children a self confidence that not only allows our children to be successful but to shatter glass ceilings. When a child lives with the knowledge that they can accomplish anything they set their mind to, we see amazing things develop during the course of their lives.

Parshat Shemini and the Number 8 teach us that we must always challenge ourselves
to live to the maximum, to set our goals high, and make our mark on the world in which Hashem has placed us. While we must always work on ourselves and help our children work on themselves, that however should never stop us from reaching for the stars and shattering the self imposed glass ceilings. Shabbat Shalom, Rabbi Y. Marrus

Remember to Forget - Vayikra-Zachor

Remember to Forget
Parshat Vayikra-Zachor

This week we begin to read a new book of the Torah, Vayikra-Leviticus. Additionally, as this week is the Shabbat before the Purim holiday, we read the special portion of Zachor. This portion discusses the Mitzvah to remember what the nation of Amalek did to us.

The Torah states  "Remember what Amalek did to you, on the way when your were leaving Egypt. That he happened upon you on the way and he struck those of you who were hindmost, all the weaklings at your rear, when you were faint and exhausted, and did not fear G-d. It shall be when Hashem your G-d gives you rest from your enemies all around in the Land that Hashem your G-d gives you as an inheritance to posses it, you shall wipe out the memory of Amalek from under the heavens-You shall not forget"! (Devarim 25: 17-19)

Simply understood, this commandment (Rambam- Positive Mitzvah 189) is telling us the importance of never forgetting what the nation of Amalek did to us. As we have seen throughout our long history, there have been many foes who have tried to destroy us. The wicked Haman of the Purim story was from this cursed nation, Amalek. Similarly, our sages tell us that all anti Semites and ill hatred toward Jews has its roots in Amalek.

But when we examine the words more closely we observe a seeming dichotomy. We are commanded to wipe out the memory of Amalek and also to not forget; two seeming opposites ideas! This begs the question, are we to forget the pain and misery of Amalek and wipe it from our memories, or are we to remember it all?


Every individual has faults and failings. While we would rather people see only our good and beautiful attributes, we know that we have many faults. In fact, no one knows our faults better then ourselves. As we try to better ourselves and live a more positive and constructive life, we are often hindered by our weaknesses. How do we move forward? How do we rise above our failings? How do we put the past behind us?

Perhaps the reading of Zachor is providing us with guidance that we must learn from our past and remember our faults in order to grow. Without remembering and learning from our past we are deemed to make the same mistakes again. While it may be uncomfortable, it is a necessary step in our healing. "It takes enormous trust and courage to allow yourself to remember" writes Dr. Bessel A. van der Kolk (The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind, and Body in the Healing of Trauma). When we deal with the past in a healthy way, we are then able to harness those experiences and character traits, and then transform them.

We must remember the lessons from our past in order to wipe out the negativity of our lives and move forward in a healthy and beautiful way.

Shabbat Shalom,
Rabbi Y. Marrus