The Virtue of Busyness - Acharei

The Virtue of Busyness
Parshat Acharei

Summer is in the air. With Pesach behind us and school break just a couple of weeks away, it is normal to start thinking about summer plans for our families. So many of us struggle with the following question, do we pack our children's summer schedule or do we purposefully not overschedule their days?

In this week's Torah portion of Acharei, we read of the special Yom Kippur service of the Kohen Gadol (High priest). Quite different than today's Yom Kippur experience, where we all sit in Shul all day and pray from a Machzor (High Holiday prayerbook), in the days of the Bet Hamikdash it was a solo performance by the Kohen Gadol. The Mishnah and Talmud dedicate an entire tractate to the service of Yom Kippur and all of its details. In this Tractate Yoma, we learn of the extremely hectic schedule of the Kohen Gadol on this day. Beginning early in the morning of Yom Kippur, he began the service with the standard Avoda (temple service), moved on to the special Yom Kippur sacrifices, the five immersions in the Mikva (ritual bath), and the changing of clothes (from the all-white vestments to the golden vestments), and finally the apex of Yom Kippur-the Ketores, the special offering of incense in the Holy of Holies.

In short, it was an exhausting and emotionally draining day for the Kohen Gadol, while the rest of the community waited for him to finish. 

It seems counterproductive to be so busy with technicalities and details on such a holy day. Would it not have been more spiritually fulfilling to sit quietly, deep in thought, and pray? Why was there the need to have the Kohen Gadol so busy, running from service to service, all the while trying to focus spiritually on forgiveness for himself, his family, and the Jewish nation?

Perhaps this is a lesson in time management and success, and it might also be a lesson in true spirituality and growth. So often, we tend to think about growth and success in terms of a quick fix. We want instant gratification and results. Holiness is associated with things that make us feel spiritual and holy. We think that it is about pausing instead of doing.

I would like to suggest that the Torah is sharing with us a great truth- that holiness is about bringing spirituality into every aspect of our lives, instead of trying to escape to a holy place outside of our lives. If you want to be productive and live life to the fullest, try bringing meaning and purpose to your busy and hectic life instead of trying to run away from it. Being holy and spiritual is about doing good things regularly, not just once in a while. If someone cares about their health, they exercise regularly, not overdoing it on one day, but rather exercising consistently and routinely.

We are never too busy for growth and the ability to find meaning in our everyday tasks. As the saying goes, "If you need something done, give it to an extremely busy person". Because, when a person can organize and structure their time and find purpose in every moment, they will not only get things done, but they will be purposeful in everything they do.

Wasting time or doing nothing is counter productive. Yes, we need change from time to time, and we need to be mindful about stress, being overworked and unfocused. But doing nothing or not having focus never brings good things. Instead, we should find mindful ways to change our environments and everyday routine during the summer to bring our children a welcomed change and excitement in their vacation. But let us not forget that being busy and productive is a blessing and something that breeds success.

Shabbat Shalom,
Rabbi Y. Marrus 

The Broken Whole Matzah - Pesach

The Broken Whole Matzah
Passover Second Days

As we prepare to enter the last days of Passover, and the allure of a fresh slice of pizza and real cake start, let us examine more closely this “bread of affliction” that we have been eating since the holiday began some seven days ago. The Matzah, made simply with water and flour and baked within eighteen minutes, has no time to rise. As such, it does not become Chametz-leaven. This simple poor-man’s bread is the Matzah that we are commanded to eat during the duration of the Passover holiday.

But what is it about this bread of affliction, this broken bread, that is so special.

The famous Rabbi Menachem Mendel of Kotzk (1787-1859 Poland) known for his witty and pithy wisdoms shared many deep and meaningful sayings such as "there is nothing more straight than a crooked ladder" or "there is nothing more black than the (white burial) shrouds" and most famously, "there is nothing more whole than a broken heart." I want to humbly suggest another pithy wisdom - though obviously my suggestions don't rise to the level of the famed and venerated Kotzker Rebbe - There is nothing more whole than a broken matzah.

I don't speak of the literal Matzah, since as time has taught us, once it gets cracked, it can't be made whole again. I speak however, of the broken matzah that represents a sense of wholeness and humility at the same time. For when we recognize that we are broken, that is the greatest stepping stone and catapults a true sense of self-worth and identity.

The broken matzah, is the eternal awareness that this Matzah will never again be a perfect circle (square for some) again and will always need someone else to complete it. It is the intimate realization that without HaShem we are nothing and without our fellow we are lacking. But when we allow Hashem into our lives and recognize the G-dly spirit in another, we are not diminished, in fact we are elevated to become truly whole.

Pesach is our special opportunity to step away from the “leaven of life, representing ego and haughtiness, and grants us the ability to access our higher selves. While we eat “whole bread” all year, it is during these special days of Pesach that we access our innermost vulnerable selves. 

Indeed, there is nothing as whole as recognizing that we are lacking.

With blessings for a Chag Sameach, Rabbi Y. Marrus

Eat. Faith. Heal - Passover 5782

Eat. Faith. Heal. Passover 5782

Passover brings forth so many memories and experiences. Almost every family has family-specific customs, memories, and humorous stories of Seders past. That’s part of what makes Passover such a cherished holiday with cherished traditions.

Of all the commandments, customs and rituals of the Passover Seder, one stands out as being the most synonymous with the Passover experience – the eating of the Matzah. As we recite in the Haggadah, “This Matzah that we eat… is because the dough of our ancestors didn’t have time to rise before the Holy One Blessed Be He redeemed them”.

Why the big deal about eating Matzah? Is there possibly something more to it?

The Holy Zohar (main work of Kabbalah) teaches that the Matzah that we eat on Passover night is the Matzah of Emunah (Faith) and the Matzah of Refuah (Healing). The eating of the Matzah represents the faith we had in G-d Almighty that he would redeem us and that he would heal us from all our ailments.

In this spirit we are taught that when we eat the Matzah at our Passover Seders, we focus on Faith and Healing. We ask G-d to help us have faith, to broaden our intellectual and emotional capabilities, to be able to surrender ourselves to His master plan. It’s not exactly an easy task.

Additionally, as we eat our Matzah we pray for healing. We are not only asking for physical healing from sickness and disease, but spiritual healing, and cleansing as well, which allows us to become sensitized to G-dliness and holiness. 

These two ideas are interconnected. As Jews, we recognize that our long and complicated history is intertwined with our ability to connect to the spiritual and see the silver lining in the most difficult of situations.

Matzah is the magic potion that allows us to tap into the deepest part of our souls. 

May Hashem bless all of us with good health, Nachas, wisdom, clarity and the ability to be healed, spiritually and physically, and to reconnect with our faith in a more profound manner than ever before.

From our family to yours, we wish you a  Chag Kosher V’Sameyach - A happy and Kosher Passover.

Rabbi Y. Marrus 

The Four Kups - Pesach

The Four Kups
Chag Ha'Pesach 

The Pesach holiday is all about education. The Seder is steeped with special things that we do in order to engage the children and have them ask many questions. In fact, one of the biblical Mitzvot of Passover is the Mitzvah of education. As the Torah states  והגדת לבנך - and you shall relate it to your children (Shemot 13:8).

Another theme of Passover eve is the number four. Four cups of wine represent the four expressions of freedom, and the four exiles that the Jewish people endured. Finally, the four sons are enumerated in the Haggadah. These four sons; the wise son, the wicked son, the simple son, and the son who does not know how to ask, represent not only four positions in our spiritual realities, but also how we all possess each one of these characteristics. Sometimes we are wise, yet sometimes we are simple, etc. We are all of these different children, albeit not all together at the same time.

Many years ago I attended a lecture on education by a well known educational psychologist. In his lecture he focused on a phenomenon known as The Four Quadrants of the Mind. These four quadrants or mental attitudes are categorized as (1) The Subjective (2) The Objective (3) The Inter-subjective and (4) The Inter-objective. In simpler terms, these four perspectives are what makes us (1) Followers (2) Leaders (3) Producers and (4) Achievers.  The point of this workshop was to emphasize that human beings can be divided into four general categories, and the way we process information and learn is also broken down into four categories as well.

As I listened to this lecture, two thoughts came to my mind. First, I thought about the verse from Proverbs (Mishlei 22:6) when King Solomon tell us "Educate a child according to his path, he will not turn from that path even as he grows old." My second thought was of the Passover Haggadah and the Four Sons that we speak about in the Seder. Modern Science and psychology had figured out what we have known for thousands of years.

The greatest mistake we make as a society is when we lump all people together. We set one expectation or one path for everyone. Both the Torah and Science reject this idea. In fact, every person is different, and we process information, experiences, and spirituality in different ways. As we clearly see people have different interests, styles and modalities of learning.

As we celebrate Pesach and prepare to sit at our Seders with our loved ones, let's not forget to interact with all the different types of learners at our Seder table. With a bit of effort we can engage everyone at our table and celebrate the reality that while a beautiful explanation on the Haggadah may inspire one person, a beautiful Niggun (song), or skit will inspire another.

May we all be blessed with a Chag Kosher V'Sameyach-a happy healthy and kosher Passover.

Rabbi Y. Marrus 

Counterpoints - Metzorah

Counterpoints
Parshat Metzorah


In this week's Torah portion we discuss at great length the purification process of the Metzorah (the leper). The leprosy discussed in last week's portion Tazria, and continued in this weeks portion, was a physical, yet spiritual ailment, which came about due to the sin of gossip (Lashon Hara). After a process of Teshuvah (repentance) and soul searching, the afflicted person was to bring a special offering to the Bet Hamikdash (temple).

Later on in the Parshah, we discuss another category of Tzarat (leprosy), one that would afflict people's homes. What is strange is the juxtaposition of  this type of Tzarat, as it is listed in an entirely different section, separated from all other forms of leprosy. Due to this juxtaposition, our sages derive a fundamental difference in types of leprosy.

The Sifra and Vayikra Rabbah (Midrashim on Leviticus) explain, that this type of leprosy is fundamentally different that the others. The "home leprosy" was not a negative thing, but rather, a positive one. When the Jews entered the land of Canaan, many of the inhabitants hid their wealth in their homes. Hashem therefore sent this Tzarat, and as the beams and plaster of the homes were removed, the treasures were found. Other commentators like the Rambam (Spain 1138-1204) disagree and see it as a negative thing, but different in structure, as it afflicts a persons home, not their body. In the opinion of these commentaries, Tzarat would first visit a person's home as a superficial warning, then their clothing, and only then their own body, if they did not repent.

It is fascinating to observe that our commentators not only see a different lesson in this matter, but actually view the "home leprosy", as counterpoints. 

So often, our experiences in life share this common dichotomy. What we view as a negative event, can in hindsight become the catalyst for growth and positivity. Today, we see things from one perspective, tomorrow from another. What we think was a blessing today, can in fact turn out to be challenging in the future. Take for example, that according to the Certified Financial Planner Board of Standards, nearly a third of lottery winners declare bankruptcy-meaning they were worse off than before becoming rich! The "blessing" of winning the lottery was not necessarily a blessing after all.

Perhaps the lesson to be learned from this is, that it is ok to look at our life's events from both perspectives. It is ok to feel and process something and see it as a negative in its current state, yet leave the door open for a positive outcome in the future. Similarly, we can view what seems as a positive, and be guarded about it, as we don't know what the end result is. As our sages advise us to pray for "open and revealed good" and that "Hashem bless us with what He knows we truly need."

When our children experience something difficult or upsetting, even if we don't see it the way they do, we must validate their feelings and understand what they are feeling at the moment. But we must also plant the seeds for a deeper realization and awareness of this same episode in the future. What is negative today will not necessarily be completely negative tomorrow.

With blessings for a Shabbat Shalom and peace in the world.

Rabbi Y. Marrus